A strange email appeared in my inbox early this morning. It seems to be an ad for a new product -- but was is dated August 13, 2017. Any thoughts?

Attention educators!

Tired of those housekeeping tasks around your room after students have tracked in dirt of dropped candy wrappers?

Frustrated by this year's changes in last year's "best grading and attendance program known to man"?

Looking for some way to be two places at once while assisting students with work, filling out paperwork and maintain discipline all at the same time?

In other words, do you need a classroom aide even though the district cut those funds during the last budget reduction and you lack the inherited wealth to hire your own?

The solution is at hand -- iRobot's new TeachBot Mk1.

The TeachBot Mk1 is the all-purpose classroom assistant. Not only will it perform basic housekeeping tasks like the so many iRobot offerings have over the years, but it also incorporates many important tools especially for educators.

* Grading and attendance module with the ability to link with most district software.
* Templates for over 50 standard educational forms and correspondence (discipline referrals, notes home) which can be selected and completed through voice commands.
* Curriculum database which allows for interaction with students needing academic assistance.
* Translation module for communication with students and parents whose first language is other than English.
* Unfiltered wireless internet access for when the district filtering software decides that sites about "breast cancer" are unacceptable for viewing but Hooters.com is.

TeachBot Mk1's arms are fully extendable, and the claws can be used to move items up to 300 pounds -- making classroom redecoration and breaking up fights in the hallway both simple tasks. The durable metal construction ensures that TeachBot Mk1 will be safe in virtually any teaching environment. And the sensor pod has full 360 degree visual range, so while you may not have eyes on the back of your head, TeachBot Mk1 does!

In addition to the standard TeachBot Mk1 feature, a number of options are available. The two most popular are the taser accessory (pictured in action above) for difficult disciplinary situations and an administrator detection module adapted from iRobot's line of sniper detection robots.

The TeachBot Mk1 follows in the iRobot tradition of delivering innovative robots that are making a difference in people’s lives. From cleaning floors to disarming explosives, we constantly strive to find better ways to tackle dull, dirty and dangerous missions—with better results. From war zones and crime scenes to your classroom -- iRobot!

So, my fellow teachers -- does this sound like a resource you would appreciate in your classroom.

SUBMITTED AS AN ENTRY FOR THE PPP BLOG BATTLE ROYALE